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What’s the Difference Between the “Good Girl” and the “Bad Girl?”

By Heather Hetheru



I know when I use to hear the term “Good Girl” or “Bad Girl” I always nodded at the “Good Girl” but smirked at the “Bad Girl.”  To be honest, they are opposite sides of the same coin.  Each having a trigger that activates the best of either, both, or none!


The perception of a Good Girl is that she does all the right things, speaks well, dresses well, is book smart, wears pastels, is feminine, meek, sweet, loving, and is always in the right place at the right time.  The perception of the Bad Girl is that she does what she wants when she wants to; says what she wants and what she means; uses bad language, dresses sexy or scantly, is street smart, wears black, red, hot pink, or purples.  Is seductive, strong, and sexy and is always in the wrong place at the right time!  Do they sound familiar?  It’s funny because in our culture you must be one or the other, no one really acknowledges that both exist…except some men secretly want the best of both.  They often want a lady in public but a freak in the bedroom.


But again, it’s her trigger that overrides propriety, discomfort, shyness, and fear.  Her trigger is so strong it can be activated by being unappreciated, through trauma, fatigue, oppression, subjection, repression, passion, comfort level, encouragement, freedom, joy, and almost anything under the sun.  IT really depends on the person.  Yet the trigger exists and can be; must be self-initiated.


This trigger may be prompted by external factors but the motivation exists inside the Good Girl/Bad Girl already.  Both are a necessary part of who she is and who she could become.  Instead of being one or the other, we should strive for a balance of both; first for ourselves and our sanity; then for our loved ones.


Repression is a mind and spirit killer.  It dumbs and numbs the spirit of a person down into the abyss of self-doubt, self-hatred, and acceptance of the status quo.  You are more than what you have become.  You are the balance between life and death; choose life and embrace death.  It won’t kill you!  Both are necessary in the circle of life so live before you die.  Then wash, rinse, repeat in all aspects of your life!

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